domingo, 19 de junio de 2011

Darkside of Aquarius

You are a chilly, detached, eccentric loner, with perverse voyeuristic habits and a shard of ice in your heart. You're aloof, arrogant, distant and offbeat. You are insulated in your own world and don't feel the consequences of your words or actions. You observe everyone else and never react spontaneously to any experience. Whatever you're doing, the inner you is busy making observations and taking notes. You don't do routine or reliable. You want to be needed but won't ever admit you need someone.

You are cranky and surly when it would me more productive to be charming and cooperative. You are cold and standoffish to your family, and kind and forgiving to your drinking buddies because they make you feel superior. You signal your contrariness by dressing in eccentric clothes to ensure that we all recognize your fascinating otherness.

You get out of doing all the dull stuff by acting too absentminded, intellectual and otherworldly. People believe you are irresistible and don't mind doing things for you. You pretend you have important work to do and can't be bothered. You are the king of one-liners and vicious sarcasm. You do not do violence or physical contact, preferring to set phasers on stun from an accurately computed distance. You always go for mind games instead of war games.

You come across as an icon of cool, too glamorously ironic to be contaminated by the despicable neediness of the rest of the zodiac. Every time you get near a spontaneous outburst, you activate the defensive shields, so you can look on untouched while others tear themselves apart. It's logical, but also sterile and emotionless. You have never had emotionally unprotected sex or been swept away by lust. This means you are always in control, which is good, but it also means you can get bored and fidgety. You are unlikely to have a long-term partner. You despise clingy dependents just as much as you loathe jealous control freaks.

In social settings, you seem to always be in the center commanding attention by talking about cool stuff you want everyone to think you know all about. People think you are friendly because you hang around with so many groups, but in reality, that is because you need a large enough statistical sample to make your data collection viable. You are bored by any individual's feelings and sometimes duck out of the party, not because you like your privacy but because you are taking a moment to write up your field notes on your observations. Weak people drain you, so you occasionally need to get away to recharge.

At work, you can figure out the operating system of any job in about 10 seconds. You're never on time, customize your uniform and hate being overseen. Bosses hate you because they know you could do their job in your sleep. Colleagues are awed by your insolent independence, but get upset when they come across the notebook listing all their quirks, catchphrases and secrets they told you in confidence because you seemed so nice and friendly.

Your home is a virtual reality, complete with books, papers, posters, computer peripherals, gadgets, experiments, chalkboard and a cat (cats love you.)

Ely's comments on this: Ponele.
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